Archive for November, 2010

PostHeaderIcon I can say I am proud of myself now!

I’ve been reflecting lately on my weight loss. I remember wondering after the surgery if I would really lose the weight. All my life it has been a battle and I continually lost. But now, have lost 120 pounds and feeling great. I was talking with my boss and gave him an update on my progress, yes he could see it, but when I told him how much I had lost he was shocked. He stated he didn’t think I had that much to lose, I smiled and it hit me, that I had in fact lost a person (weight wise). I still have a hard time believing that I’ve lost this much. I have times when I still view myself before surgery. I was told that would happen and really couldn’t see how you could still feel the same as before losing so much weight. But all I need to do is look in the mirror and see the change. Yes I can see it, there was a time when I couldn’t.

About a week or so ago Mary and I went down to a function at work where they where showcasing the new breakfast menu that would be served in the hotels. We walked around and looked at things and I didn’t feel like a cow trying to wind my way through lots of people. We stopped and talked a couple of co-worker while they were eating. As I stood there, I felt almost normal. People weren’t taking a wide birth around me, yes I was watching. While I still have over 80 lbs to lose, I am proud of just how far I’ve come.

I have reclaimed the life I hadn’t realized I’d lost.
I can walk up and down stairs without becoming breathless
I can walk for more than 15 minutes without looking for a place to sit down
I can try on clothes in the store and am always thrilled when they fit
I went shopping with my daughter in Stillwater, we spent several hours going through antique malls, had lunch and spent a wonderful day together. That would not have happened before surgery. I will treasure that day.
I am now crossing my leg, and the best part is my foot doesn’t stick out so far in front of me.
I can get down on my knee’s and while it still hurts, I can stand up without feeling like I need a crane to get me back on my feet. To be honest, it’s still not super easy yet, but it’s a start and I know I can do it.

For the first time in my life, I am proud of myself. Sure I have times when old habits creep in, but I know how to stop them, and get back on the right path. I have a wonderful supportive family and without their love and support I know I wouldn’t be able to keep on going.

So if anyone is thinking of having this surgery I urge you to do it. It changed my life for the better. My one real regret is that I didn’t do this years ago.